Thursday, August 18, 2011

Maybe none of us are as comfortable in our own skin as we seem.

My son is officially a member of a kindergarten class. And no, I didn't cry. My lack of tears did shock me but what was even more interesting this past week was watching his reaction to the whole thing.

The first day of school, there he was in his little uniform, looking very much like everyone else (only cuter). He hopped out of the car and I walked with him considering the load of school supplies we were asked to provide...watercolor paint of all things...anyway, the kids were lined up outside waiting for the front doors to be opened and I asked Caden if he'd hold my hand or if he's too cool for that now. He quietly said he was too cool. Keep in mind, his eyes didn't leave the crowd of kids the entire way into the building. So, being the over-protective mother that I am, I firmly placed my hand on his head instead. More to comfort myself, and yes, I realize this is my doing.

We walk inside the classroom and he's the last one to arrive. I felt terrible as he shrunk back a little after seeing all of these eyes staring at him. But he found his seat and let me walk out with a little peck on his head and a tight squeeze of his arm.

He was all smiles at the end of school that day.

Day two...the first full day. This time, I walk him in because we had forgotten some stuff that needed to be dropped off...this time, four boxes of Kleenex tissue...I barely get around to his side of the car and he grabs my hand. Again, his eyes never leave the sight of the big kids standing around outside.

I couldn't help but smile. As brave as we all want to seem, sometimes you just need a hand to squeeze to know you're not alone. I have never felt so proud of my son as I have this week. It feels like my heart doubles in size at moments like these...And I have a feeling that it's just the beginning.