This working mom thing is just as hard as it was four years ago.

This entry is a little different than previous posts...bear with me:

I have a strong urge today to say screw being responsible. I want to leave work around five (or stay until 5:45 if I feel like it) and hit the mall. Pay some bills. Just bum around. I want the opportunity to ignore the 6 o'clock deadline that my day care hits me with every single day, five days a week. I would give anything to put the full parental responsibility in my husband's court for a full 24 hours.

Don't get me wrong, I love being a mother. I love spending time with my kids. But there are days, like today, when I just want to break free momentarily. Every once in awhile I get bogged down by the burden of responsibility. I don't wear a watch because I love the idea of not knowing or caring what time it is...but reality forces me to carry my cell phone at all times. Reality woke me up twice last night because he was scared of the dark, and reality is why I was too tired (and maybe a little lazy) to get up and run this morning.

I still hold on to the belief that I can be it all: great wife, awesome mom, excellent employee and standout fashionista. But today, I'm really feeling like none of the above.

Maybe I can find a little piece of carefree me this weekend?